It's ok.......

"it's ok, sweetheart." he whispered in my ear, standing right behind me.
I silently rested my head on his shoulder, and he then put his arms around me, pressing me closer to him.
deep down my heart I knew that it will be ok.everything will be ok.
Amazing, how someone's presense in your life can make you feel secure.for as long as you both shall live.
"thank you, Kareem" is all i could say, looking at him and smiling.

A wife's day off

Today is my "day off" from family life.
Kareem will take care of the kids for the next 17 hours, and I am free to go and do whatever I wish.
I wished to just lying lazy anywhere, gazing in nothing, emptying my mind from everything.
I want to do something special. only i don't know what!!!!!
spend the day at the spa.
good idea.
go for a short trip.
sounds fun.
meet with friends over lunch somewhere luxury.
let me think about it.
go get yourself an extraordinary outfit. hasen't Kareem promised to take care of the expenses :))
not in the mood of shopping.
go for a long drive into the desert road, enjoy the empty space and fresh, sandy wind.
hmmm, not bad.

I can't make up my mind for any of these treats. maybe I need someone to take the decision for me.shall i call Kareem? of course not. he won't stop teasing me about it!!!!!

Wowwww.got that wonderful idea. thought about it for couple of minutes and made up my mind.

couple of hours later I was driving into the house entrance, wearing my hair in different coulor and a new haircut. I love the way i look like. somehow i needed the change.
Now, how would they react?

I pushed the door bell, not using my keys, to complete the surprise :)

Adham came running as usual screaming "who is it?" not waiting for a reply rather opening the door immediately :)))
"Mommy" he screamd and throw his arms around my neck. i held him kissing his rosy cheeks.
Kareem and Mariam appeared coming from the kitchen direction, rather not believing what they heard.

"you are early back" said Kareem before noticing my hair. then "wow" escaped his lips followed by a kiss on my cheeks." or you'd change and go out again?"

"No, I am staying. we are baking a family size pizza and watch Dumbo afterwards"
Heeee, poured Adham.Mommy, I will chop tomato and pepper.ok?
"sweetheart, you do me a big big favour and prepare the Dumbo-tape into the DVD. this is very important to me." he was proud of his important role,knowing how much i adore that movie.

Kareem and Mariam followed me to the kitchen. we worked on the pizza for an hour or so, then both of them offered to clean the kitchen.
Adham came running" Mommy, everything is ready. what else?"
"oh, the most important task ever.please taste a bite for me and tell me how it is"
he took a bite, filling his mouth, chewing it slowly "lovely mom. can I have a big slice?"

Everyone got his plate, we sat down in the living room.Adham put the tape into move, smiling at me.
After the movie the kids started their 'going into bed" rituals, then slept.

While I was combing my hair, Kareem asked me "why did you come home so quick? shouldn't you spend the day relaxing?"

I looked up at him, smiling and said what i exactely felt:
"you and the kids are what I really want in this life.when I thought about having fun, the 3 of you popped up in my head, and I smiled finding the answer"

"you know what" he whispered, "I love you so much" and held me very tight.
I closed my eyes, smileing and enjoying the warmth.

hey

"Hey" two arms just grabbed me.
"welcome home, you are early, Sir. what's wrong."
"nothing. just missed you, so i grabed my jacket, drove the car and got here."
"how about your work?"
"you are more important"
i just love him.
nothing sophisticated about that. it is deep, pure love, that i feel for him.
for as long as we both shall live.
for the person he is.
yah ya kareem. how much i love you- for who you are.

untitled

For long years I thought you were gone, but you were right here next to me.
For some time I thought I got over you and have forgotten you, but you were never forgotten.
For few times I thought you have forgotten me, only to feel the old passion in your words, when we talked.
For once I felt in love to only know that my feelings were a big illusion, when compared to what I felt for you.
For once I felt he was at the same level as you were, to know how precious you are when compared to him.
For once I thought I was ready for a new life, but you never left room for anyone else to have in my heart.
For long years I thought I don't love you anymore, yet here I am smiling again at your jokes when reading them - for the million's time.
For long years I thought I have forgotten your life-loving spirit, sense of humor, warmth, tender heart, caring hand caressing my soul, but they have never left my side for a second.
For years i thought i have forgotten your teasing me for being an early sleeper, joking about my Tweety-printed T-shirt and my being chocoholic- but they are still right here, printed in my heart.
For long years i was fighting against your shadow, only to find out that everyone else is a shadow,
while you are the only truth i ever knew in my life.

So I decided to accept the truth and to stop fighting.

roses for a very special occasion

I stood with my back to the kitchen door, about to take the food off the cooker.
Kareem just drove in few minutes ago and I expect the three of them to burst into the kitchen any second.
surprisingly he walked in alone, the kids not chatting with him as usual.
I was about to turn around, when his arms slid arround my waist, his right hand holding a bouquet of beautiful red, white and rosa roses- just infront of my nose.
hey, these are lovely."
"so are you"
"what's the occasion?"
"a very special one: I love you"

Me and the roses ended up in his arms resting on his shoulder, a tender smile on my lips, love shining from my eyes.
"I love you too"

a quality time

Kareem was watching his favourite show on TV, when i came and just sat there. i kept silent, not watching but just sitting next to him.
somehow he felt there is something wrong with me.
he looked at me, and silently put his arm around my shoulder pulling me closer to him.
"why do i feel a loose heartbeat here, love?"
i rested my head at his shoulder and sighed.
"would you love me when i am 70? old, weak, wrinkles allover my face?"
he looked at me and said "would you love me when i am 70, old, weak, wrinkles allover my face, all money, business and power gone?"
"of course i would. why should i change? i love you for who you are, not what you have. and kareem, to hell wiht money and power. i need only you.
he kissed my cheek lightly and said" darling, you have just answered the question yourself. to hell with beauty and anything superficial. you will always be beautiful to me, no matters what. those eyes will always shine for me. this heart will always held mine. this smile will always warm my soul. that doesnt change ya mariam."

i rested my head back on his shoulder and held him tight to me. we remained silent afterwards. then went to sleep shortly after.
God, i needed those few moments.
there was something filling my heart. a calmness and reassurance i needed. for no particular reason. maybe i just needed a kind word.
and he is always there for me to give love, warmth, reassurance and tenderness.
Kareem, how much i love you !

Kareem's birhtday

Today is Kareem's birthday.
he is 43, looks far younger with his smiling, vivid eyes and incredibly young spirit.
maybe that is why i love him so much? i dont know. i dont remember how my life looked like before loving him.
I got him a watch of his favourite brand, simply wraped in it's case. red box having only the trade mark on it.
I will go to his office at 2 to give it to him. Already asked his secretary about his schedule. he has 15 minutes before next meeting starts. I would surprise him in those 15 minutes. wont wait until he comes home.

I arrived there 10 minutes early just to have time to check on my looks at the ladies' room, then marched into his office. winking at his secretary, i knocked the door.
come in, dalia.
i walked in and wihtout looking up from his laptop, he stretched his hand to me, thinking i was his secretary brining documents for the next meeting.
My face lit with a bright smile, while i was walking to him. stood infornt of the desk when he looked up.
Mariam???, hey, love. that's a pleasant surprise.
he stood up, came around the desk, gave me a quick kiss. what's up? where you in the neighbourhood?
No. i said. i came to give you this. and held the while bag up.
white simple bag, holding the shop's name "Time Trade". says nothing to him.
it's your birhtday's gift. i wanted to surprise you. maybe you'd even wear it for the next meeting.
he looked bluffed somehow. looked at the box inside the bag, and still cant figure out what it is.
i felt a childish happiness.:)))))
he got the box out and immediately recognized the trade mark graved on the red box.
NOOOO
looking at me with his big boyish eyes, surprised and not daring to believe.
"yes. please open it and see if you like it first. then we can talk"
"this is too much. this is too expensive. this is too precious."
"you are more precious to me"
this was all i could say. i wanted so much to tell him how much i love him, how much i appreciate his mare existence, what he means to me. but i kept silent and my eyes said it all.

he opened the box, looked at the watch. took it out and held it in his hands.
"it looks lovely" he said.
"we can change it. i chose another one at the shop and put it on hold. i know you have a meeting in 5 minutes. if you wish to see the other one, i'd stop at the shop and ask them to hold it longer for you till you check it and then choose."
he came closer, kissed and said "we are leaving right now. come"
"hey, your meeting."
"can wait"
we walked out of the office, he talked to dalia for a second then we left.
"leave your car here. the driver can get it home. come with me" i said. i know he is too tired to drive.
i drove to the shop, he checked the other watch, but decided he liked the one i chose better.
"come, let's have lunch. i am hungry" he said. there was a hotel nearby, we went there and checked the restaurant. it's one of his favourties.

the restaurant was nearly empty. we chose a table next to the window, placed the orders and just sat there.
he wasnt talking. i knew he wanted to say something. he was looking at me, so intensily.
we kept a light talk about business, the postponed meeting he was happy to escape, the kids.
food arrived. his favoourite pasta and my sea-food pizza.
i wasnt really hungry. i was very happy. I wanted today to be a happy day for him. i wanted it to be a special one. IT IS SPECIAL TO ME.
simple happiness filling my heart because he liked my gift. becasue i love him. because we were having lunch together, forgetting the whole world. just being wiht him makes me happy. i kept looking at him while we talked and my mind drifted away. i was thinking, oh God, how could i possibly love soemone that much. we share our lives, we have a home, kids and a stable life. wonderful in every meaning of the word.
but he is not my husband. not in the traditional meaning of the word.
he is the man i love. so much. to the extend that it hurts not to hold him. wish i could hold him right now.
none would have objected.

as we were leaving, i was walking next to him and we were having light conversation. deep down i was aware of all people around us. i wanted them all to know how much i love this man. I wanted them to see how much i was happy. i was smiling, my eyes shone with all the happiness and excitement i feel. i was listening to him and smiling. i said nothing. but my eyes said it all.
they simply said it out love: God, how deep i love you. in every single meaning of this word. for the rest of my life.
i drove back home. we were talking, still light things. nothing serious.
the kids were about to sleep, we kissed them good night and went to the living room.

he sat at the couch as i came in with the cake. chocolate cake. small one with only one candle to blow.
heyyyyy"
i smiled. " it's only you and me this year. i didnt invite anyone. your parents will come for lunch tomorrow"
he came closer to the table, leaned and blow the candle.
i took a photo of him. he looked up at me and smiled. i took another photo. and a third one.
i cant resist not capturing those moments of our lives. so i went on taking pictures.i love taking pictures of him. if it was up to me, i wouldnt have stopped taking pictures of him. i often take photos of him without him noticing. while he works at  home, sleeps, talks on the phone, plays iwht the kids.
i even have some of him while he was shaving.
when he notices me, he keeps laughing and says i should work as a photographer to get this need fulfilled.

he cut the cake and handed me over a slid, cut a slide for himself, then sat next to me on the couch.
we silently ate it.
Kareem turned to me, taking me in his arms, kissing my cheeks and said " thank you sweetheart. this was just wonderful. everything. the surprise, the watch, the lunch, the cake, this hug. you are too good to be true.
I am lucky to have you."
I held him very tight, kissed his cheek and just said " you don't know how much i love you. it is beyond explaining. beyond words to express. you are all i have and all i ever wanted."
and i meant it. he is all i have and all i ever wanted.
Kareem, the love of my life.

Adham's birth

Adham and Mariam are playing with Roy- our dog- just few meters away from me. i was watching them, and somehow my mind drifted away to the day when Adham was born.
It was early morning on a Thursday, when Kareem drove me to the hospital. he stayed at my side the whole time, till our son was born. holding my hand, soothing my anxiety and sharing my pain and happiness.
the first moment our son had in this world was in my arms, with his father holding both of us.
I had a mixture of feelings: happy, secure, scared, tired, satisfied, but above all deep gratitude for what Allah has just granted me. A loving husband and a healthy child. this is all what i ever wished for.
what could a woman possibly want more?

We agreed on naming him Adham. both of us love the name.

Kareem stayed with me until i was released from the hospital, never leaving my side. somehow he felt how much i needed him. in a new and more intensive way, i needed his support.
i was scared to do any mistakes and harm our child. his smile and helping hand were there to ensure me it is ok and everything will be fine.

our first night at home with Adham he kept hugging me almost the whole time. as if he felt that he was our shelter.
the moments i held Adham in my arms were incredible- but the moments Kareem held me were just indescribable feeling.
Home was in his arms. warmth was his touch and safety was his heartbeat when i leaned against him.

I still remember how i felt right before falling asleep on that night: deep, solid and never ending love for my husband.

"Mummy, have you seen that?" my little champ came running to me, smiling and excited about something that just happened.
i didn't want to disappoint him by saying that i was miles away. i just held and kissed him.

Ya Allah, how can i ever thank you enough for what you gave me :)

surprise...surprise

Kareem is up to something. i can see it in his eyes.
they dont shine and smile this way, unless he is up to something.
when he left about 2 hours ago, he was in hurry and wouldnt say where he is going. it's friday. he rarely goes out alone on a friday. it's our day.

just finished lunch, changed and looking out: here he drives in.
i go meet him, like i used to do when he comes home.

"close your eyes and ears"
"eyes, ok. but ears? why?"
"just do it"
i did. closed my eyes and plugged my fingers into my ears.
after about 2 minutes i feel him coming closer to me, kissing my cheek and taking away my fingers from my ears. i automatically open my eyes.

its music. unfamiliar to me. then Kazem starts singing.
hey, this is the new album?
"yes, love"
" didnt know it is released. thought it would be after 2 weeks."
"this is a special edition for you,sweetheart."
he held me, kissing my cheek " it is good to have connections, you know. i know the producer. he promised it a while ago.this morning he called and said i could pick it up. so here you go. enjoy, love"

I held him back, very tight.
"it is good to have a loving husband.no connections needed here"

Fun day :)

its the kids Fun day at school today. a friday as usual.
Kareem usually keeps an eye over his laptop for urgent business matters, yet stays home for the weekend. today this will be hard to keep, if he would join the kids in their activities :)))

pushing the door open, both of them run to their sleeping father waking him up with squizes, kisses, hugs and evn holding his nose (Mariam's favourite gesture)
daddy, its funday. wake up.
a pair of sleepy eyes opened and looking at me: isn't it still early?
no. you have to get up :)

Driving to their school, they were thrilled. singing, teasing eachother, teasing their daddy and just chatting.the atmosphere was fun. a good start of the day so far.
Kareem was whistling melody of our favourtie song, and i found myself just wanting to sing. i sang the words to the melody he is whisteling.he looked at me and send me a kiss in the air :)

the whole school is decorated with colored paper and flowers. many stands offering different entertainment thigs for the kids: face painting, card games, vidoe games, snacks, ice cream, juices, funny accessories for girls, etc.

each class has prepared a small show to present infront of parents and teachers throughout the day.
Adham's class is no. 5 in row. they prepared a short play. he is so secretive about it. refused to tell me what it is about. only asked to borrow a tie from his father. Kareem gave him his favourite blue silk one. i was surprised of his choice.
Mariam's class prepared a song for Sayed Darwish "el 7elwa dih".she ran to her join her class at behind the stage to get prepared.
on time, the teacher announced the song, the curtain opens showing the girls & boys standing in 2 rows.
music started and they started to sing.they sang first part all together, then music. then to my surprise Mariam stepped ahead of her row to sing the second part-just few words- solo.
Kareem and myself were suprised to hear our little girl singing alone, and watching her standing bravely on her own, head lifted up and sooo confident of herself.
she has her daddy's character, i whisper to Kareem. he leaned towards me whispering back "and her momy's charm" holding my hand and slightly squizeeing it.
as they finished, me and Kareem rushed to her. she came running into her daddy's arms into a big hug. I joined in the hug, we both kissed her.
"sweety, that was lovely" he said kissing her.
"i am good daddy? thank you. i kept practicing because i wanted you to see me good"
Go on, change your cloths and lets have some fun, i said. she ran off.

Adham was playing football with his friends. we waved to him that we are going to the face painting booth. Kareem chose to pain a lion face, Mariam chose a butterfly, i chose a bird's face.
nose is yellow,rst of my face is blue, green and yellow. Momy, you look funny-said Mariam.
it is funday sweetheart :)))
we moved to another booth, Adham joining. he and Kareem played some shooting. Kareem won a soft teddy.good shooter :)
we checked some other booths, the kids got some snacks and juices, till it was time for Adham to join his class for preparation.

He disappeared behind the stage and once more we were seated waiting for our son and his role :)
the class imitated a school day. stage is prepared to look like a classroom, kids are seated and waiting for the teacher to start. Adham came in standing infront of them playing the teacher's role. from his words, the kids should guess which one of their teachers is he doing after.
now, that is crazy AND funny.
i looked to Kareem and found him with a bright smile.what is it?
"this was my favourite game at school. mimicking teachers and my colleagues guessing who it is. it was my idea, you know, when he asked me"
ohhhhhhhh - was all i could say :)
Adham is a good actor. his colleagues had fun guessing and asking questions- while he kept the serious face of the teacher.

after the play, handing over the tie to his father, he asked "daddy, was i like you"
"absolutely, champ" looking at them, junior one was glooming from happiness, senior one was proud of his junior "picture"
"why can't i get enough from loving you?" i whispered to Kareem while we are moving.
"maybe because i still have so much to give you, 7abibty"

we checked some more boothes till it was time to leave.
on the way back Mariam sang again, while Adham kept interrupting her with his stories.
kareem and myself were quiet. listening to them and just enjoying their laughter.

they are finally in bed, still too excited to sleep, but they will in a while. i kissed them good night and went to check on Kareem.
he is sitting in the living room watching the video we made today, and silently smiling to himself.
just looking at him and at the screen showing our kids made my heart heavy with love and happiness. I am blessed with a wonderful husband and my kids with the best dad.

El7amdollah 3ala ne3metak ya rab :)

A very special occasion :)

Kareem won't be home for dinner, it's just me and the kids. he is working late again.

I decided to ware the blue dress Kareem insisted to get me few weeks ago. I liked it very much, but knew i couldn't possibly wear it with this deep cut at the back and front.but he insisted on getting it. :)

I hear him driving in, so I hurried to the door and opened it just as he was about to put the key in.
"hey, you look lovely. i thought you forgot the dress."
" was just waiting for a special occasion to wear it, love. welcome home." i hold him tight just like i do every day.

I prepared some light sandwiches for him, knowing he will not eat warm food that late at night. cheese & salami mini sandwiches and frozen yogurt with fruits for dessert.

While eating, he seemed to be preoccupied. then he looked at me and said:
"Mariam, I am sorry. i don't remember what is the occasion we are celebrating tonight. its not our anniversary, nor any one's birthday. I am sorry, just things at office have been very hard lately. hm, would you tell me what we are celebrating tonight?"

" a very special occasion to me: you're coming home after almost 18 hours of continuous work. I just missed you at home."

a very long tight hug, saying all what we wished to say.
How much I love and cherish him, how much he appreciates and loves me.

A very special occasion :)

cakes for breakfast

I stood up earlier than usual, having some fun in mind: I would bake a cake for breakfast.

"Love, would you share the morning fun, or you'd rather sleep for 30 more minutes?"

he opened one eye asking what i have in mind  "baking cakes for breakfast"
"it's only me who is helping out?" i nicked. he jumped off bed, kissed my cheek and while going to bathroom he said "give me 10 minutes, and i will join you".
Good. fun is about to start :)

"what are we baking?"
"chocolate, Cinnamon and orange cakes"
"i love you for that" he said, kissing my cheek again.
"get to work ya doctor" i smilingly pushed him away from me towards the table, handing him the mixer.

I hear him behind my back mixing the eggs, sugar and butter, while was putting flour with cocoa, flour with Cinnamon and flour with orange skin pieces and juice- each in a different pot to mix later on with the fluid Kareem is preparing.

I was testing the texture of cocoa and flour, when he put his arms around my waist talking to me from behind "finished madame. what shall i do next?"

i turned around to tell him to get the pot over here, when i realized that he had tasted it. he had a fine yellow line just above his upper lip. I touched it, forgetting that i already had flour and cocoa at my fingers.

that was funny, they all mixed at his upper lip and I was already laughing and telling him he has a chocolate cake ingredients at his upper lip.

"oh, this is unfair. I don't possibly want to keep it all." with a simple move, he took some of the mixture from his lip and put a point at my nose top.

"Heey, don't do that" i tried to pull my face far from him, when he was already hugging me and laughing out loud.

"stop laughing. you have some yourself. I am no wonder" 

he stopped laughing and smilingly kissed it off my nose.

I was mixing the ingredients, when Kareem was standing right behind me, reaching out for the pots, dipping his finger in each one and tasting it.

"don't do that. this is unhealthy. eggs are raw in there"

no answer, of course. Adham inherited this from him. whenever he catches me in kitchen, he must taste anything i do, no matters what it is.

"that tastes good. but here you should put in more Cinnamon, this is not as strong as usual. check it keda."
he pushed his finger with a lump of raw cake in my mouth to taste it. true. it needs some more Cinnamon powder, I say."see, if it wasn't for my tasting it, you would have never realized" he teased me.

cakes are in oven to bake, I am making the dishes, while Kareem dries them.he enjoys such simple doings, as if it takes aways the load of mental work he usually does at office. I enjoy having him around. I love spending time with him, doing anything. dishes, reading, talking, nonsense, just anything. and I miss him when he is at office.

Adham and Mariam came running into the kitchen, hugging and kissing us good morning.
Adham climbed at his back as usual, while Mariam hang at his neck. he sat on the kitchen floor talking and laughing with them. when i came to his rescue, he pulled me down to them, holding us all into a family hug.
"cakes are ready. we can move to the dining room" I urged the 3 of them to stand up.
6 pairs of eyes looked up at me, of them 2 daring eyes smiling at me, he said with the same childish smile as Adham "Can't we eat here? just as we sit there? Please?"
I can't resist his smile, his young spirit nor his loving eyes when they look at me like that.
"of course, love. why not. who cares about dishes."
we sat on the kitchen flour, me with a small knife cutting the cakes, giving each one of them slice of his favourite. they were neat enough to held a small tissue in their hand to keep parts from falling on the floor.

"Thank you, sweetheart" i received a kiss from my husband. "for the fun, time we spent alone, the unusual breakfast on the kitchen floor. and for your Love".
" you are more than welcome ya doctor. have i told you lately that i adore you?"
"no. you have 3 minutes to tell me and to kiss me goodbye before i run to office".
"I adore you. " I hold him very tight and kissed him :)

A lovely morning

I was sleeping tight, when i felt a slight push against me, and the little figure was lying just at the edge of the bed- about to fall down.
i moved to the inner side of the bed, and hold him.
"what's worng Adham?"
"momy, i can't sleep"
"but you were already asleep long time ago, sweetheart"
"now i can't. can i sleep here?"
"yes, love"
i held him tight, hoping he would get back to sleep.
in few seconds he fell asleep, resting his head on my shoulder and his little arm across my stomach.
i couldn't help it: i gave him a long kiss on his forehead. it feels so warm to hold him so close. it's been long time since he slept in my arms.

i was careful not to make big moves or noise, for not to wake Kareem up. he has a long day at office tomorrow. all his days are long at office.
so i moved very slowly towards the bed center, just to give our son some space to sleep. otherwise if he turns arround he would just fall from the bed.

A warm, tender arm pulled me to the inner side of the bed. Kareems arm pulled us together towards him. he woke up, afterall.
"sorry, love" i whispered.
he didn't reply. just pulled us closer, put his arm across me and reaching to Adham- pulling both of us into a big, tight hug.
it feels so good. warm, tender and secure. God, how much i love him :)
in seconds i was asleep myself.

I woke up as Kareem was about to stand up.
"Lovely morning sweetheart" he kissed my forehead and stood up.

This IS a lovely morning.
what could i possibly want more than his love as a morning gift?

a day in my life....

"Muuuummmmmyyyyy" shouts Adham as soon as enters the house. I heard the bus stopping at the house entrance and watched as 3am hussein opened the gate and let the kids in.
"welcome home ya 7abibi. I am in the kitchen" don't want them to come in here, so I hurried to the hall, before they make it to the kitchen.

Adham, 7, dragging his school bag behind him as he walks, while Mariam 4,-Kareem insisted on calling our daughter after me- just dropped her lunch box on the floor.
as soon as i appeared in the hall, they ran to hold me. I opened my arms and held both of them at one big tight hug, giving each of them a kiss- and receiving theirs as well. Mariam didn't wash her mouth after eating her chocolate. she smells after it. not that I mind. she inherited being a chocoholic from me :).

"All right, up to your room. get your bags and move."
they did as told with very slowly moves, maybe I would just let them have lunch without taking a bath????

Their nanny would give them their bath and they will come down as soon as they finish. their lunch is ready anyway. i got back to the kitchen. missing is only the salad. I won't add the dressing to it now.

Kareem left office 20 minutes ago. everything is in oven heating up, salad is finished, table is ready. missing is only the house mister.

here he is. I hear him driving in, and hurried again to the door.

since his first working day after our honeymoon I made it a habit to welcome Kareem home with a hug. no matters who is there, what i am doing, this is my first priority. when he joked about it, i teased him back " i want you to throw all stress, pain and tiredness at my shoulder as soon as you get home". I dont hug him, I literally take him into my arms and let him rest his head on my shoulder for a minute. longer if needed, as long as he needs. I see -from his smile - how much he is relieved afterwards.

"I am starvingggggggg"

"Dinner is ready, sir. waiting for you"

"just a shower and i am eating all what you cooked"

10 minutes later he appears at the dinning room, grabs a piece of Sambousak with his fingers, ate it and licked his fingers!!!!!!

I said nothing, for not to drag the attention of 2 pairs of eyes going big and round, watching what daddy does.

Adham started his daily reports about school, Mariam plappered some things too, while Kareem listend half-heartedly. he looks so tired and hungry. most probably he forgot to eat his apples and left them at the office' fridge.

Mummy, could I have a fruits yoghurt instead of the plain one?

sure, sweetheart.

Mummy, could I have jam added to mine? Mariam inherited this part from me too. I can't object.

7ader 7abibty.

I am back with the yoghurts, they took it and ran off to their father's office. knocking of course, but not waiting for his permission :)).. this is HIS part in them. he cant complain about that.

I hear the three of them chattering at same time. how do they understand each other????

as long as they laugh, its fine with me anyway.

"bed time" they all went silent. Kareem looked up at me with this look in his eyes cant-they-stay-longer?

you have 15 minutes to give daddy his good-night kiss and come up."

they all hate me. well, i hate myself too. i love having them arround, with all noise and demands. but, we just have to.....

story finished, both are tucked into their beds, time for mummy's hug and kiss. how much i love this moment. when i hold them close to my heart. when i feel their heart beat and warmth. when i see their smiling sleepy eyes, fighting for not to close and drop in a deep sleep.

Adham and Mariam have inherited this life-loving spirit from Kareem. I smile to myself. wasn't this spirit the first thing that attracted me to him?

I went downstaris to check after Kareem. sitting on the living room couch, i found him starring at the TV. aaaahhhh, another action movie. ok, then i will read in my book. only, i hoped for his company.

bas ma3lesh, he needs some relaxation afterall.

how can anyone relax watching an action movie? wenty malek ya ghelsah :))))

as he noticed me approaching, he pulled me to the sofa " see this". i looked at the screen. eih dah, its not action. its "you've got mail".

i gave him a what-is-wrong-with-you look.

he pulled me closer to him saying " i want to spend some quality time with you. so i decided to pick up a temptation you will never reject"

we watched the movie, curled up on the couch- not saying much. Kareem held me tight the whole time. i didnt move out of his arms. not for a second. too comfortable to move.

"thank you"

"for what 7abibty?"

"for your love, the hug, the movie and the quality time"

"you know what, all pleasure is mine. It is a pleasure loving you"

ya rab, el7amdullah 3ala ne3metak :)