Lately i have been feeling trapped, living in Egypt and was taking serious steps towards moving out.
What i am in now is more than trapped, i feel prisoned.
I am not allowed to travel and live on my own, because of religious rules- which i obey of course.
it is not Egypt anymore, from which i want to run away.
after some thinking, i could identify what i am feeling: i feel prisoned.
prisoned in a society, which rejects me
prisoned between people, who i can not communicate with
prisoned in a role, which i can not fulfill
prisoned in a thinking way, which i have to follow- or i am considered as insane.
prisoned in a feeling way, which i have to follow- or i am considered as weired and usually blamed for it.
prisoned in a life style, which i hate
prisoned in a crowded city
prisoned in a gender, which has no value after certain age.
prisoned in a weakness, which everybody abuses to kill me
prisoned in a materialistic figure called "Hebba", to which i can not relate.
Ya Allah, I can not go on like this. I need your help and guidance. I cant find my path anymore, I cant take cruelity of people any longer, I cant live in this world without your help.
I have none else but you to turn to, who would help me through this.
Ya Allah, save my soul and er7amny bera7metak ya kareem.